When I was small I used to have recurring nightmares. The same nightmare every night. I had a horrible first grade teacher and she was hell bent on ruining my happiness I guess that caused me my nightmares. I would dream a herd of kids , a sea of kids to be exact , after school , filling the grounds, trying to get out and my mother would be looking for me. I would go towards her, but would get distracted by some people playing cards so I would stop to deal a hand . When I go out, my mother wouldn’t be around. I was never able to find her. I would wake up, panicking, drenched in sweat, half crying and half panting.
Then I would collect my pillows and my sheet get down from the bed and open our room door. Dad would be sleeping on the floor right outside the room.
I don’t know why he did this. I never asked. Maybe I should have. But what I do know is that I would plop down next to my father and go straight to sleep, not scared one bit. I did this for a long time until I got over my nightmares. Which took a long time, coz when I got over the horrible teacher, we had our little brother and I started getting nightmares that someone would kidnap him. I was positive back then that everyone around us were plotting to kidnap him coz he was the cutest baby ever !
Well, I digress.
last night I couldn’t sleep. I tossed and turned and when I fell asleep I had a nightmare. The details of which I have completely forgotten by now. I woke up half screaming , drenched in sweat and for a fleeting brief moment considered looking for my father. Then I fell asleep.
When I woke up, I remembered that I thought of looking for him but didn’t remember the dream. And I remembered I should probably note it down somewhere that when I was small, he always came to my rescue. And that’s why I am such a Daddy’s girl. And that’s why I will always be.