You are bound to see people getting registered i:e legally married and call it an engagement and actually wait for another 6 months to start living together. After the poru ceremony.
The ‘engagement’ is a huge affair too. It has the legal bit of it, exchanging of the rings, closest friends and relatives, massive lunch AND cake.
Somewhere somehow people also decided to have the poru bit in a posh big hotel and invite half the people in the eworld. And regard that as the event that really counts. it doesn’t matter if a month is lapsed between these two occassions, or three, or an year. The couple is not considered married until the second event. And you thought we were living in the modern times. ha !
Anyone else thinks this is utter stupid?
While I think this is ridiculous, We’ve had to do this too because the legal system is screwing us. Our wedding is going to be held at a place where neither me nor him were born in, or lived in so we can’t get legally married there. We can only do the other bits. We have to do the legal bit earlier to compensate for this and give proper notice of marriage. I am not happy about this, as we as a couple did not want to abide these ridiculous customs, but it has to be done, and I am actually getting to get married at home, so that’s a good thing.
There are other reasons as to why people get registered earlier before the poru ceremony/big party. If the couple is going to live abroad after getting married, they need to apply for visa as a couple and for that they need to be married. So they take a mini legal wedding minus the poru. Some couples has to go through this because their parents don’t have to answer to their relatives about the girl hanging out with a guy all the time. Get them registered, the matter is solved. urgh.
I think it’s high time Sri Lankans gave up these stupidities. I know I come across like a know it all arrogant person when I say things like these, but I just don’t see why people who are actually getting married, don’t do any sort of thinking. We are going through a lot of traditions, and I am trying my level best to understand what they mean and why, and questioning why is a dangerous thing around here, but I want to know, so that I can one day make sense for our children. And teach them the good things and leave out the bad.